Top 10 Things I’ll Miss Most about China

10. Celebrity appeal: The big group of people who look nothing like each other but all speak very fast and loud English and no hint of any other language MUST be American. This is how we were distinguished in an international crowd. On the Beijing Subway, we were quite the circus show to be stared at.

9. “Dialogue” on the only English channel we get (CCTV 9 International): This has become my favorite show in the past weeks. It includes a Chinese man sitting down one-on-one with random Western big-shots to talk about their significance. I was constantly shocked and utterly entertained by the interview questions. It was on this show that I heard the host ask the Greek designer of the Athens 2004 Opening Ceremonies, "Since you are openly gay, and gay people are famous for being honest, is this why you speak so much about being honest and living a life of honesty?" It's a real classy production.

8. Squatty potties: Believe it or not, there have been several occasions since I figured out how to use them where I have sought them out over the option of the Western toilet (with respect to the public restroom scene). They're more efficient, less skin-to-porcelain contact and a good stretch... all rolled into one delightful experience!

7. Rickshaws and bicycles everywhere: Never again will I feel threatened by the whizzing bicyclists on Purdue's campus. These riders here in the "Kingdom of Bicycles" really know what's up and how to work it. I've seen rickshaws loaded up with more goods than my dad's pickup truck can handle!

6. My roommate Andrea, even if she watches me sleep.

5. Smile Beijing volunteers: At nearly every street corner you can find a kiosk with eager, knowledgeable volunteers that, even if they can't help you find where you're going, they're always excited to trade pins with you!

4. Popsicle stands: This is quite possibly one of the most unexpected goodies of China. There are popsicle stands EVERYWHERE with complex assortments of treats ranging from corn popsicles to ice cream cones. We fancied ourselves a popsicle in the mid-afternoon nearly everyday, and it was really entertaining picking a flavor from the colors and images on the package when the labels were all in Chinese. What a delight!

3. English T-shirts: Many Chinese teenagers wear shirts with hilarious English phrases on them, for example, “BALLS,” “Falling in love, she’s my girlfriend,” and “The shit’s cool.” We asked one of the Chinese volunteers about them, and she confirmed our suspicions that no one really understands what the shirts say, they just think they're cool because they have English on them. I guess it's the parallel experience to Americans getting Chinese character tattoos and really having no idea what they say... which is also hilarious, by the way.

2. The prices: I am making you a promise right now that I will walk into a store and try to bargain down for a better price once I get home tomorrow. It is guaranteed to happen, and it will be awkward for the shopkeeper. I will also whine and complain about the prices of things when I've been eating meals for less than $1, riding the subway for $0.30 and buying 20oz bottled water for $0.15 apiece.

1. Everyday is an adventure: In Beijing, this is the one thing that's guaranteed. Everyday, regardless of what you plan, things will change. There will be obstacles. There will be hurdles and hoops and tripwires. Everyday there will be a challenge, a game and a triumph. Everyday I have an experience that instantly becomes the most interesting thing that's ever happened to me. At home, it's so easy to get in a rut and not grasp the excitement that follows you around. Being here has made me realize that a simple trip to the supermarket just might be the best adventure you've ever had.

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The next time we talk could be from US soil... how exciting is that?!?!!

XOXO

Kelsey vs. China: The great love affair

Over the past couple of days, I've spent countless hours bashing, blaming and belittling China and it's ways. I can't begin to explain how different of an experience it is to live and work in a foreign place than it is to visit a foreign place.

I have to admit that China was really starting to grow on me. The people as individuals are probably the most gentle, caring folks I've ever come in contact with. So many people have been genuinely interested in us. They want to know where we're from, what we do and why we're here. They want to be friends with us. They want to tell us about their hometowns and cultures and what they do. They want us to love them just as much as they love us.

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For example, the other day a girl named Yao who works with us saw Andrea reading "Atonement" at work. She picked up the book and made over it like it was a new puppy. Andrea, surprised by the interaction, offered to give Yao the book after reading it. Andrea had planned to leave the paperback here anyway to make more room in the suitcase.

The next day, Yao came into work just beaming. She pulled Andrea aside to give her a gift. It was a homemade, handwritten card that she crafted. It was addressed, "To Andrea, Xiang Mountain, Beijing, from Yao Qiong." Inside was a sleeve of handmade bookmarks with Chinese poetry written on each one. On the bottom of each, there was a leaf. Yao had walked around the night before and found the most beautiful leaves to decorate the bookmarks. She gave them all to Andrea as a thanks for the book.

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Once the Games started, my love affair with this place got a bit more rocky. Dealing day in and day out with the Chinese on a professional level was quite a test of my patience and sanity. There were times where I thought these Games would never even happen. There were other times when I considered not wearing my uniform so as to disassociate myself with the hoards of Chinese volunteers stopping athletes during training sessions for personal photo shoots and autographs on their accreditation cards. Once a Chinese volunteer, whose job was language service, stopped translating an athlete's quote in the middle of the sentence in order to bust out his camera and take a photo of another athlete that was passing by.

There was one Chinese FQR (exact same job as us) that would frequently skip out on work early, or show up late, or just not come at all because he just didn't feel like it. Then he got upset when our international manager screamed at him for his insolence. Before opening day, massive groups of Chinese staff and volunteers would find a comfortable bleacher seat in the velodrome to take naps all day long. It wasn't until an AP photographer published a photo of the great siesta that a stop was put to the laziness. Even so, they then continued to nap inside the walls of the office.

Each day, coming into the ONS office was an obstacle course of Blue Army members snoozing all over the place or watching TV. In addition, staff members and volunteers of the Olympic Games were supposed to be impartial during the competition. Regardless of your national affiliation or fanship toward a particular athlete, you are a professionally and morally inclined to control yourself. You wouldn't think it would be that difficult, especially in a sport where your country can't even compete with the big boys. OH NO, there was more clapping and yapping and slap-sticking for China by the volunteers than there was by the ticket-buying spectators! It still infuriates me.

The "Blue Army," as it came to be known, was the source of my insanity for two weeks during the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games

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So then there's us, the fifteen international volunteers who look upon the actions of the Chinese volunteers as totally embarrassing atrocities. We run around and sweat and curse and produce, getting more done in ten minutes than half of China does in a day.

The Chinese are great at doing exactly what the book and the schedule say and not getting strayed off course. However, when it boils right down to it, the plan usually sucks and the schedule doesn't work. For example, lunch at the velodrome was everyday from 11-1pm, and each department had a 20 minute shift. During competition, however, lunch occurred right in the middle of some of the most important races.

Or how about the pre-Games medal ceremony practice that occurred during the middle of a training session for a handful of nations? They blocked off the entrance to the athletes' ramp so no one could go up or down during the ceremony. This is perfectly fine during the actual medal ceremonies when the Games are on, but for PRACTICE they wouldn't allow athletes up from the locker area to the velodrome floor, thereby denying certain teams their right to train altogether. I'm sure you can imagine how happy the coaches and athletes were about that!

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But then we come home from work and start preparing to leave for good. As we say goodbye to each of the Chinese volunteers that became our good friends, my heart melts for them. Li Lihuang, our ONS buddy who actually never partook in any of these crazy activities that I mentioned above, brought me a gift this afternoon. He noticed I always doodled on my notepad, so he got me a set of watercolor pencils to "make better drawings." He also got Traci a movie DVD, and Jason got a Bible written in Chinese.

Li had really been paying close attention to each of us since we've known him. He is thoughtful and genuine and values our friendships deeply. Did we have a gift for him? No, but it didn't even matter. That wasn't the point. Li (and all the other Chinese friends) did this because we are important to them, and in their culture, you express those feelings out loud.

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So where does all this hemming and hawing and bitching and moaning get us? After seven weeks, it smashed me in the face. This is China's Grand Paradox. This is the love/hate idea. This is exactly why no one can figure this place out.

China and I have wrestled and battled and bruised each other. We have hugged and kissed and embraced at times. We have danced in the moonlight and cried in the rain. I have seen the dungeon, and I have seen the castle. China has been my worst nightmare and, in an instant, my greatest fairytale.

As the Olympics dwindle down and my new Boilermaker family starts to leave, I realize: China is the single greatest adventure I have ever embarked on, and I am humbled to have had the opportunity to experience it.

XOXO

Ni hao America!

Christina at road cycling

Christina and I at road cycling

My nonchalant America spirit I sported throughout the Games

Andrea rockin' the USA spirit at Paul's Diner for the Opening Ceremony

Val at road cycling

Me at the softball gold medal game... we lost :(

Lauren, Phil, Jane and I at softball. I guess all the Chinese people thought they were going to melt in the rain?

See you soon, America :)

XOXO

If only things went according to plan

I had planned to write you this brilliant note about how I battled hard in the trenches for softball tickets and finally found admission to the gold medal game. I had planned to tell the predictable yet awe-inspiring tale of how the USA won the last ever Olympic gold medal in softball tonight with me as a witness. I had had big plans.

BUT that wasn't exactly how things shook out. Yes, I fought off every obstacle in the book to ensure myself a seat at THE game. Yes, I met a Canadian former international gymnastics judge on the subway who judged competition at the Sydney Olympics before retiring. Yes, I also met a beer vendor named Mao who pointed me in the right direction for my ticket sale. I also encountered a man named Cookies and two British women decked out in Team USA gear. Yes, I scalped four tickets for ¥500 apiece from a BOCOG employee with an infinity pass. But NO, not all things went along with my agenda.

The United States won the silver medal in softball this evening, snapping a more than 20-game Olympic undefeated streak. Japan prevailed to win the gold medal, and I was not a happy American.

BUT soon I realized, because I have been equipped with the ability to adapt to changing situations, that it is absolutely better for the sport of softball that the Japanese won tonight. While my heart shatters to think of the USA losing, it also recognizes a good opportunity.

The USA has won every game since the Sydney 2000 Olympics. They've won three of four Olympic golds. They have been the heavy, heavy favorite in each game they've played since the Atlanta 1996 Games. Tonight's match was about so much more than gold medals. Tonight's match was a defining point for softball on the international level. Tonight said, "Softball deserves to be an Olympic event, and damned you for thinking otherwise." The game proved that nothing ever goes "according to plan," and sometimes that's better off in the long run.

This is one of the greatest things I have learned in the time I've spent in China. It's also one of the greatest hypocrisies of Chinese culture. In a place where nothing is ever "according to plan," things are never done outside of "by the book." Working in China has made me realize that no one here thinks outside the box. Not one person can adapt to surroundings and go with the flow. The Chinese people I have worked with the past six weeks cannot even deal with the fact that China is the most consistently inconsistent place in the world. China doesn't even deal with it's own inconsistency, it just continues to go with "the plan," which often times leaves us all looking completely ignorant and without credibility.

Six more days.

XOXO

Beijing vs. Home

Christina and I at the Today Show set on the night we went to Athletics at the Bird's Nest. Despite heavy security, we bribed a guard to let us in with a couple of shiny Purdue pins. NO, we did not see a show, we were there an hour after it was over

Jason and I reflected on our time in Beijing… China… Asia… what have you, over a nice Pizza Hut dinner one day. It came up that many people have been asking, "So how does Beijing compare to home?" We tossed around ideas for a while, but quickly realized that in this case, we really aren't comparing apples to apples.

Beijing has 16 million people. Wrap your brain around that for a moment. Indianapolis has almost 800,000, Lafayette/West Lafayette has about 90,000, and Chicago just has 2.8 million residents. Heck, New York City only has 8 million! When I describe “mass amounts” of people, I’m not even kidding.

Given that we've been treading water in the middle of this metropolis with little to no direction or instruction for six weeks now, I think we've managed pretty well! Imagine if someone dropped you off in the middle of NYC with two suitcases and some hand-sanitizer, how would you get along? Now picture the scenario happening entirely in Chinese.

The bottom line is that Beijing in no way compares to home. It can't be compared to home. Sure, there are different customs and traditions and ways of living, but Beijing and “home” as I know it are not comparable worlds. The truth is that this place in no way stacks up to my home, and, on the same token really, my home in no way stacks up to Beijing.

XOXO

Ouch! My ego hurts.

The other day at the road race, I suddenly felt something that I’ve never felt before, and it sure as heck is an emotion I never thought I would know. With 500 meters to go in the race, for the very first time in my life, I was really, really embarrassed at being an American. Right now I can sense my grandmother steaming and going through the roof, so I best explain.

Everything in China is on the metric system. Temperature is in Celsius. Everything here is exactly the way the rest of the world is with respect to units of measurement. As an American, the metric system, military time units and Celsius temperatures might as well be Martian languages to me (as in, from Mars). In addition, who the heck thought it was a good idea for me to be fluent in just one language?

I take flash quotes in a mixed zone with a two-man crew from EuroSport that speaks nearly every language on the European continent like it's nothing... and I stand around looking like a huge doofus waiting for them to translate their interviews for me. And my personal favorite is when these athletes speak multiple languages. That really makes me feel accomplished, "Hey, I'm an Olympic champion, and I speak four languages. What do you do?" Or how about on the subway when a 10-year old has a full conversation with me in English and then translates it to his parents while I sit there hearing, "Rubble, rubble, rubble."

Amongst an international crowd in such a foreign place, I feel alienated by my own culture. I am the one translating 500 meters into “about five football fields or so” every time someone talks. And let's not even get started on that tangent. Of course football is football in the rest of the world, as well it should be! They use only their feet to play it!

From this point forward, my ethnocentric vocabulary is done. Soccer is dead to me. Football and American football shall be distinguished. Track and field is simply “athletics.” I want to be fluent in metric associations. I want to familiarize myself with Celsian degrees. Ask me the time, and I will respond on the 24-hour clock. If I have the mental capacity to learn another language at 22-years old, then bring it on. We Americans have been slighted by our own small-mindedness, and I firmly believe it will continue to separate us from our world if we don’t wake up and recognize.

America, I love you, and I miss you. But you have caged me into believing it wasn't important to know how everyone else operates, and it has made me feel quite small on the international stage. It's not wrong to have our own ways, but it is straight ignorant to neglect the others'.

XOXO

This chick may reek

I'm pretty sure I smell.

I remember once, maybe in the second week, brushing the hair out of my face and catching a whiff of the sweat on my arm. In an instant I had a pukingly clear revelation: my sweat smelled like China. The aroma was so distinct, yet I cannot pinpoint the exact recipe. It was a mixture of the taste of your local Chinese buffet on $3.99 night and the stale air in a parking lot of a sewage plant with a little hint of green tea.

The problem now is not that my sweat smells like China. The problem is that I no longer recognize that my sweat smells like China. I can't even distinguish the odors anymore. There is no separation between the scent of my clothes and soaps versus the outside world. The food doesn't have that eerie-yet-intriguing taste of Asia anymore. It just tastes like food.

I fear that I have become one of those baby chicks that falls out the nest and absorbs the odor of the outside world and, therefore, is not recognized by her own kind upon her return to the flock.

Mom and Dad, please be warned that when you come to pick me up in Chicago next week... I might smell a little bit different.

XOXO

A whole lot of lingo

Since the Games have started, Beijing has become a whole new world. There are people here from literally every country in the world. We were sitting in a restaurant the other day where the only Chinese people in the place were the servers! What a drastic difference from our first few weeks in Asia. I've heard a TON of Russian, French, Italian, German, Belarussian, Greek, Dutch, Spanish, Arabic, Malay, New Zealand English, Aussie English and British English... and very, very little American English. There are so many languages flying around that it is impossible to keep things straight sometimes. And just when you think you can rely on the host country for a bit of consistency... you learn about this:

Here’s the quick and dirty when it comes to the Chinese language. Since China has 55 very different ethnic groups across 9.6 million square kilometers, the “language barrier” extends beyond us Western folks and even separates the Chinese citizens. Patrick, who is one of my fellow Purdue students here, grew up in Shanghai. He speaks fluent Chinese but is often misunderstood and can’t communicate easily with the people here in Beijing. Apparently people from Beijing, Shanghai, and Hong Kong all speak different dialects, different pronunciations, of the very same language. Patrick says that Beijinginites have a distinct accent in which they add an “errr” sound to the end of everything.

In addition, there are two distinct sects of Chinese, Mandarin and Cantonese. So things can get really interesting around here. Our Chinese volunteer friend Li says that in his hometown there are different characters than regular, widely accepted Chinese. These characters are more symbolic in nature and have a flavor that's closer to the hieroglyphics of the Egyptians.

Given all the diversity in language experienced on a daily basis, I'm sure you can imagine what life is like as a Flash Quote Reporter. The gap between the very modern and prospering American English and the ancient Nakhi Chinese dialect is enough to constitute separate worlds! Plain and simple, there are things that just do not translate. These two, for example, are so uniquely not the same that one could classify them as different modes of communication altogether.

At work, we've got quotes coming at us in all these languages, and we're trying to get them all filed in British English in just 10 minutes after they're delivered by the athlete. Can you imagine scribing a quote about the "four heads god" listed above without losing any detail or significance?

Welcome to my job at the ONS.

XOXO

Beating Bolt to the finish

"RUUUUUNNNNN!" screamed Phil as we dashed out of our ¥75 taxi ride to the entrance of the Bird's Nest, "THIS IS THE FREAKING OLYMPICS!"

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BOCOG really did us international volunteers good, again. Tonight, we had tickets to the Athletics competition at the Bird's Nest from 7pm-11pm. Most people dressed in their full USA garb complete with bandannas, scarfs, flags and face paint. Some even had homemade shirts! I, however, had to work.

After transcribing quotes taken from the velodrome floor on to the computer all night long, I was seriously ready for some live Olympics action. The Keirin race was to be over by 7:30pm, so we had very high hopes of being out of there and in a taxi on the way to the Olympic Green by 8:30pm or so.

Yeah right. At 10:15pm I was pounding press conference quotes into the computer as fast as my little typist fingers would go. I finally got the last one in and sent. As we gathered our belongings, many of the group decided to flake out on the Bird's Nest event. The general thought was that we'd never make it in time, but I wasn't having a word of it. I didn't care if I went alone. I was going to that darn Olympic Green regardless. You see, the Olympic Green area is very exclusive. You can't even access the area without proper credentials or a ticket to one of the venues there (i.e. the Watercube or the Bird's Nest). Tonight, I had a ticket and I was going and nothing was getting in my way.

Luckily, a couple of other valiant individuals had a change of heart and realized the opportunity could not be passed up easily. We grabbed a cab from the 'drome and were well on our way by 10:25pm. This is where the "beating Bolt" part comes in.

We literally sprinted from the cab to the gate to a different gate through security to another gate up the stairs through more security up one more flight--pause for breathing--and finally into the concourse where we thought we were to be. An usher grabbed Jason to ask where we were going. We were in the wrong place, "But just come in here!" he said, "There are only 10 minutes left!" We ran, again, through the opening to the field and up to a couple of empty seats.

As we sit down, we glance at the video board. "Men's 100m Final," it reads, and there are 10 sprinters lined up in the blocks ready to make history. The gun blows, and in a flash, Jamaica's Usain Bolt is skipping around the track goofing in a way that puts Chad Johnson's touchdown dances to shame. The video board reads the finishing times, and then, in big bold letters, "NEW WORLD RECORD!" It took 9.69 seconds for him to make world history... 9.69 seconds!

We continued to watch as he danced around the stadium taunting the crowd for more and more cheers. He was SO outside himself with excitement, and we couldn't be more overjoyed to share it with him and 90,000 of our best Chinese friends! A fellow from Trinidad took the silver, while American Walter Dix came away with bronze. The race was the capstone of the night, the final event. And while we only got to see the one sprint, it was THE race. The 100-meter dash defines the Olympics. Tonight, I saw it happen at the Olympic Games and watched as they crowned a brand-new "World's Fastest Man."

Talk about goosebumps! I thought they would never go away!

XOXO

Jason, Phil and I after seeing Usain Bolt win 100m gold and set a new world record at 9.69 seconds!

Yes, Nanno, I'm really here at the National Stadium with the Olympic flame!!

The group photo opp between the Bird's Nest and the Watercube. From top left: Chris, Jason, Chad, Val, Caty, Jane, Alysha, Megan, Christina and ME!

Flash Quotes: Men’s Team Sprint to kick off Track Cycling competition

BEIJING, 15 August – Comments from Kelsey HABIG (USA) before the Men’s Team Sprint competition on opening day at the Laoshan Velodrome on Friday.

Kelsey HABIG (USA) – ONS Flash Quote Reporter

On the favorites to win the competition:

“France comes in as the reigning world champion, but the British are a machine that cannot be reckoned with as of late. The Dutch team should be hungry, too. Don’t count out the Germans either, as they attempt to defend their Athens Olympic Gold. Australia is a long shot but should be tough competition.”

On the USA’s chances:

“The USA is not a threat in this competition. However, should they pull a miracle and make the medal stand, I won’t be able to hold back the tears during the Star Spangled Banner.”

On the athlete’s to watch:

“Stefan NIMKE (GER) is the only returning gold medalist, so it should be fun to see him match his experience with his teammates’ youthful energy to try and work some magic on the track.. As always, Theo BOS (NED), Chris HOY (GBR) and the retiring Arnaud TOURNANT (FRA) should put on a good show.”

“It should be a fantastic start to the track cycling events, and I’m looking forward to seeing it all happen!”

On where you might see her on TV:

“I’m not exactly sure, but pay close attention to the area around the medal stand. The mixed zone is immediately to the left and right of it, so check for the ‘blue army’ outfit, the blond hair, and of course the fantastically sexy blue ONS bib. During the victory ceremony, I will probably be standing off the left shoulder of the bronze medalist.”

ONS kh

The ONS bib you should look out for on TV :)